I went to a "celebration of life" this past weekend for a woman I didn't know.
Susan.
Oh, how I wish I could have known her. She seemed to be the type of person you would want around when you're living your happiest moments... or your darkest ones. She breathed life. And she obviously lived it well.
I know and love, to my very core, her son and daughter-in-law. They are truly some of my most favorite people walking around on this planet. If they are anything like their mom (and they are), then I'm honestly convinced that they exude Mrs. Susan's essence. They can't help it. She lives on in them. And their kids. She left a legacy. It's who she was and what she was about.
At her celebration, a phrase stuck out to me. I can't remember who said it as there were many speakers and people who shared stories. Of course people are going to say sweet things and tell funny anecdotes and share lessons learned. It's what we're all supposed to do in moments and events such as this. We laugh. We cry. We remember. And we learn. And we glean. And we grow. And we're changed.
The phrase "in the middle" was used in a message by one of her friends. In The Middle.
As in, we are all given a birth day. And, we're all assigned a day to die.
But, what are we doing in the middle?
Right now, I'm in the middle of Mt. WashMore. And Mt. FoldMore. In an hour or so, I'll be in the middle of working on dinner. I'm in the middle of trying to finish up our school year. I'm in the middle of a teenage girl learning to drive. Of a prepubescent boy navigating through hormonal hell. Of his little brother, The Hulk, who is always hungry and on the very edge of HANGRY at any given moment. I'm in the middle of ACT scores and multiplication facts and cursive handwriting and foreign languages. I'm in the middle of trying to figure out how year 17 is sneaking up on my marriage. I'm in the middle of falling in love with my best friend over and over and over again. I'm in the middle of bills and stretching pennies out so far that they beg for mercy. I'm in the middle training a dog to SIT at the door and not BOLT out of it. I'm in the middle of raising my kids to be good, kind, respectful, loving, friendly, relationship driven, purpose finding, human beings. I'm in the middle of making healthier lifestyle choices. I'm in the middle of watching babies grow into toddlers who grow into preschoolers who grow into students who grow into learners who grow into thinkers.
I'm in the middle.
I'm still trying to figure out what I'm supposed to do with it.
It seems to me that everywhere I look, people have figured out how and where to spend their middle. We've all been given time and resources. We've all been given an assignment. We've all been given cheerleaders to help us to navigate through our years. We all have a purpose.
We all get a middle.
Where are you in yours? Do you have any advice? Questions? Goals?
Is there anything you know you HAVE to do? Is there anything that you WANT to do before the middle turns into the end? How do you know you're where you're supposed to be, doing what you're supposed to be doing?
The question of being "in the middle" was clearly answered by Mrs. Susan, and by those who knew her and were loved by her. Her middle was spent well. Her middle made a difference. Her middle gave way to new beginnings.
Through someone I've never met, I've been changed. I've been made better.
Here's to you, Mrs. Susan!
For living in the middle.
I am in the middle of aww, after I read this. I think of my mom aka your other mom. She had a very short middle but well lived. She would be so proud of you and your journey. I could see her at her laptop (because I know she would have one) reading every single thing you post. My heart runeth over!
ReplyDeleteShe DID live well her middle. She shaped us on so many levels. She lives on. No doubt! I miss her every day.
DeleteBree - There is a reason we've been friends from moment one: because I already knew you in so many ways. The same spirit that was in my mom is in you. Keep pushing. We love you.
ReplyDeleteLove you guys. I would have been her friend. I just know it! I've already learned much from her. The force was (and is) strong with her!
DeleteSusan lived her middle (her dash) well. Like all of us, Susan was not perfect, but she was a good and faithful servant. She did not wait until her death to live with Jesus and so He prepared her for eternity with Him.
ReplyDeleteHere is the story of the Dash.
The Dash by Linda Ellis
I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning to the end
He noted that first came her date of her birth
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years
For that dash represents all the time
That she spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not how much we own;
The cars, the house, the cash,
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard.
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left,
That can still be rearranged.
If we could just slow down enough
To consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger,
And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives
Like we’ve never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect,
And more often wear a smile
Remembering that this special dash
Might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy is being read
With your life’s actions to rehash
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you spent your dash?
© 1996 All Rights Reserved, Linda Ellis
I love this. Thanks for sharing!
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