So It Begins

I turned 39 today. That's weird. It just is. People are supposed to be wise and have it all together by now, right? One more year to 40. That's when we're REALLY supposed to be grown up and mature. I've only got a year to get my act together. God has a neat project in store for Himself. And me.

Cool stuff usually happens on my birthday. Kind of like a universal, cosmic gift happens almost every single year. No joke. Last year was one of my favorite gifts. We were able to help get a sweet friend and her kids out of a pretty nasty situation. We spent the morning of my birthday moving her, the kids, their cat, and the bunny to safety. That night a surprise party was planned, and totally executed, without any hiccups by my sneaky, sneaky husband. One of THE BEST and most emotional and exhausting birthdays ever! I wouldn't have it any other way.

This year, however, has been bittersweet. Last week, there were two deaths.
Cancer.
Both of them.

I don't know why I get to have another birthday. My friend was just a few days away from hers when she had to leave behind her baby and husband. One of our best friends "lost" his mom less than two weeks after being diagnosed with stage 4 killer beast whatever. She's not 'lost' though. We know exactly where she is. And I'm willing to bet, that she is exactly where she's always wanted to be.
 
So, I'm at this weird, in between age, of losing friends and losing parents. It's surreal.
 
Don't get me wrong, I'm incredibly grateful to wake up to another year. I have been married to, who I KNOW is one of God's most patient, humble, kind, brilliant and passionate creatures. He's My Favorite. He makes every day and every night worth waking up and going to sleep. My kids are our greatest and most humbling, awe inspiring, insanity and thought provoking creations. They are part of our Crazy. It's a good thing we do Crazy right! I love it and only think "What the heck was I thinking when I signed up for this?" maybe once or twice a day now.  It's progress. A WIN, for sure.

What do I do with my 39th year though? I haven't really done anything spectacular as far as breathtaking experiences or exploring the world goes. Although, my husband is in missions. He could tell you some jaw dropping stories. Ask him sometime. Mind. Blowing. I'm pretty awesome at doing laundry and feeding my kids. I'm also a kick butt friend. I'm good at the little stuff. I suppose it's the little stuff that adds up. I'll just keep doing more of that. I like doing it. My 39th year will be more of me being me and doing what I'm doing.

Oh, and this blog.

Because when I asked my Creator what He had in store for me this year and what was He planning for my birthday, He told me "You're going to write the blog you've been talking about doing for YEARS. No more talking about it. No more making excuses as to why you can't do it. No more waiting to be ready or qualified or having something to say. You're going to DO it. Year 39 is a year of DOING while BEING. Stop being a little girl and put your big girl panties on and DO it."

Well played, God. Well played. And Yes Sir, I'm on it.

So it begins. Happy Birthday to me!